“You look great! Have you lost weight?”

It happened again, and this time I have to write it down.

I have been told, on numerous occasions, that I look great.
Lovely, I know. But, it is always followed by, “have you lost weight”, “you look slim”, or, “your face look thinner”. However, I know that I, on all of these occasions, haven’t lost any weight.
Can’t people just understand that I am hot and look great when they see me?

Hot or healthy, doesn’t have to be skinny or thin. People can look great just being themselves! We have to stop associate weight loss with good looks, and we need to start giving compliments without mentioning the other person’s weight. There is so much more to a person’s beauty than the amount of fat or muscles on their bodies, and these “compliments” are triggering.

I am glad that I am confident enough to not feel bad about it. I usually reply, “well I haven’t”, and they usually reply, “but I can tell”, and I say “well then it’s because of stress, which is not a healthy weight loss” (even though I know I haven’t lost any bloody weight). I try to call it out, to say that it’s because I feel well, or even that I have gained weight, because this needs to stop. The person that you “compliment” might have an eating disorder (which comes in EVERY shape and size), and your comment might start something they are trying to fight.
You can instead compliment someones skin, choice of dress, or confidence.

I am hot, and it’s not because of my weight.
But far from everyone are in this state of mind.

So stop commenting on people´s weight, unless they’ve explicitly asked for it. And, maybe even then, don’t?

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